The Matriarch

One year instead of a birthday gift from my parents, I chose a birthday trip to visit my Great Aunt Charlotte. At this time Great Aunt Charlotte held the regal title of the Matriarch and I wanted to interview her, and find out what I could of what she remembered of our family members and record it. My mom accompanied me and had some questions of her own too, and her mother was no longer around to ask.  

We flew to Arizona to visit Aunt Char and Uncle Howard. It was a quick trip, a long weekend, but I treasure that trip. It was the first time I saw the house that I had been sending Christmas cards and letters to for years. Aunt Charlotte was my long-time pen pal with the most exquisite, precise handwriting (pictured above) on thick quality writing paper- the kind that feels decadent to hold. 

It was the first time we were hanging out without the distraction that goes along with a large family gathering. We connected in a way that we hadn’t before and over morning coffee interviews recorded on a first generation iPad, I was able to discover some family history, my mom was able to ask her questions, and Aunt Char was able to recall family facts that she hadn’t thought of in years. And there was a sobering realization at one point that she was it- there was no one else she could ask questions of. She commented multiple times how she wished she would have asked her mother while she was still here. We pieced together what we could and I am so thankful for those interviews, especially now. My great (and boy was she was great- with a capital G) Aunt Charlotte is no longer with us and my mother now holds the auspicious Matriarch title. 

 There are so many questions to ask of the Matriarch or Patriarch. Start with the basics and any burning questions and layer on from there. Some suggestions are:

• Do they have or know who has the family records, special mementos, and any items of family significance (war medals, special jewelry, etc.)?

• What were their favorite childhood family traditions - anything around holiday celebrations?

• Are there any health issues they know of that run in the family?

• What is their best memory of their grandparents (or even their great-grandparents if they can remember them)?

• Did they take family vacations or have reunions in a beloved spot? 

• Ask about their siblings and some adventures they had together as children.

• And for some excitement- ask about any family scandals.

Have fun researching and remember to record and share what you discover.